Monday, August 15, 2011

Being Enough: Be Enough Me Monday Link Up

 

I got pointed towards a great new blog, Just.Be.Enough, when a blogger I follow Robin from Farewell, Stranger guest posted there. Robin's post, On High Standards and Hating Myself struck a chord with me as a recovering perfectionist. After looking around at the rest of the blog, I fell in love with this post, 37 days.

...The truth is that I am not a perfect parent, nor do I ever expect to be. I am the best parent I can possibly be, or at least I try (on most days). There are some days that I know I am not at my best, and yet, that is the best I can muster in that moment.  And you know what? That has to be ok. That has to be enough...
Go read it. I'll wait.

There are so many people that need to hear this message of being enough. Knowing that you are enough empowers you to just be. To be present. To be happy. To be aware. To be loved. To be everything you are meant to be and already are.

In parenting, in depression, and in life, be enough moments can be hard to come by, rare even. It can feel like we always need to be something else for someone else. It can feel like we always need to be something more. Just a few days ago, I became acutely aware of a be enough moment before I had the words to call it that. It is a moment that I am blessed to recreate daily, sometimes twice daily.

I have a two year old son who still loves to nurse. He realizes he is sleepy around bedtime and naptime, climbs onto my lap, and says "mommy nurse me, please". It is the sweetest phrase to hear, and while sometimes I say not yet or hold on or I feel annoyed at having to stop what I am doing, that all quickly melts away. It melts away when we climb the stairs to our family bed and he crawls to his spot waiting for me. It melts away when no matter how upset, anxious, exhausted, or overstimulated he is, he curls into my arm and latches on. In that moment, we both breathe a sigh of relief and contentment as we melt together. It doesn't matter that we've been fighting all morning and I have no idea how to teach him the things I need to teach him (like you can't throw your wooden car at the television set repeatedly). In that moment, I know that I am enough. I know that I am everything he needs. No matter my parenting failures, my short temper and my tired days, in that place and time, I am meeting that little boy's every need, and together we are finding forgiveness, grace, love, and connection.

It's in that moment, that I truly believe that I can just. be. enough.

8 comments:

  1. Thank you so much for linking! Isn't is amazing how those moments can sweep everything else away, even if just for a brief minute. I am so glad you are able to celebrate the many amazing things that you ARE enough (and amazing) at.

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  2. That's absolutely beautiful! I have the same feeling when I cuddle up with my son to read stories at bedtime - it's a different sort of enough, but he's my baby in those moments and I'm his mama.

    I'm so glad you found us at Just.Be.Enough. Thanks for linking up and sharing your story with us!

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  3. That moment with your son? Just amazing. And you are the only person in his world who can give him that.

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  4. beautiful. really really beautiful.

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  5. What a beautiful, peaceful moment between you and your boy; thank you so much for sharing that.

    However, if you figure out the "no throwing toys at the TV" thing, please let me know IMMEDIATELY, because it is a trial at our house, too!

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  6. This is really beautiful! I can only imagine what that must feel like, to know you're everything he needs in that moment.

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  7. I love how snuggling up with your child and taking time to just be with them can make the stresses of the day just go away. Sometimes it is hard to realize, but when we do it is all so wonderful and worth it! -Laverne

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  8. I understand perfectionism. I'm one, my kids are, my husband is. It's haaarrrrrdddd. It's painful to watch it in your kids and want them to not be that way. It's hard to model "just being enough" rather than perfectionism. BUT. You are so right. It's so important. Thanks for a great post. Found you through Just Be Enough.

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